As I sit here now, a happy, contented woman, a proud mum and doting nana, its hard to recall the painful memories from my past – thankfully. I can honestly say that the years of fear, bullying and abuse no longer define who I am today.
I have managed to leave behind a turbulent, and at times, violent childhood. It was no wonder that I left home as soon as I could. I enlisted in the Army and surprised myself at how much I loved it, I think it was because for the first time I felt part of a community, I found a job I was good at and there were friends and importantly, laughter. With this new “headiness” I married quickly only to find it was less than ideal, an abusive marriage that did not last long. But there was one highlight from this marriage, my son (but I handled motherhood very badly – are you beginning to see a pattern here?). I eventually married for a second time but that too turned out to be a difficult and abusive marriage – honestly, why me, I am not that bad -am I? During my second marriage I had moved to London and ended up working in the corporate world for over 20 years, in a job I hated.
It’s a small miracle I have retained my sense of humour but needs must.
It was after the breakup of my second marriage, when I was being bullied by my boss at work. I found myself siting on my kitchen floor, unable to get up, unable to speak, when something inside me snapped -- enough I thought, I cant keep living like this, I have to do something, no one is going to abuse or bully me ever again, and I want to find a way to help stop this happening to others too.
That is how I found myself drawn back to learning about human behaviour and also deepening my spiritual knowledge. Something that I had dipped in and out of all my life. I meet some very interesting people, learnt a lot, some of it I agreed with some of it I didn’t. But I also experienced some deep and profound changes in me, changes that enabled me to release myself from my past and start again, without the baggage. I embarked on a journey to understand and learn as much as I could about the Tarot (something I have been involved with all my life) and the many ways it can help people, I studied Life Coaching to understand how we work as people, both these have had a huge positive impact on my life.
They helped me to get past all the endless excuses and reasons why I could not do or achieve something. I was able to unravel my past life experiences, I learnt about my emotions and behaviours and started take responsibility for myself. I noticed my relationships dramatically improved both with myself and others, and I was finally living and enjoying my life
Spirituality, together with my love of the nature and the great outdoors plays a huge role in my day to day life and the work that I now do. All this has been born out of a real, honest desire to share all that I have learnt with others who also wish to move on in their lives and simply want to be happy and contented.
If any of my experiences resonant with you, know that you do not have to put up with a life less than you deserve or want. If you are ready to see yourself and your life through a fresh perspective, one without blame and judgement, I would love to be your guide and support you.
I met Debbie by happy chance when I was at a very low ebb in my life. She opened up to me a completely different way of viewing myself and my problems. I now understand that I cannot change painful past experiences, but I can change the ways in which I think about these things, and think about myself. The answer for all of us really does lie within, and Debbie transformed my life by helping me to see this. She has remained in my life as a true, honest and supportive friend. Patsy Sower, C.B.E. , Essex - -2018